Finding My Way Back to Art (and to Myself)

Batik painting in Ubud, Bali

For most of my life, I thought I was doing all the “right” things. I built a career as a counselor and educator, checked the boxes of achievement, and kept myself busy on the hamster wheel of productivity. On the outside, it looked good. But inside, I felt more and more disconnected—from my creativity, from my freedom, and from myself.

Eventually, I hit a breaking point. The university job I had poured myself into no longer fit. Leaving felt terrifying, but staying felt impossible. So I walked away.

At first, I tried to take what felt like the “safer” step. I started my own career coaching practice—something familiar, respectable, and still tied to my background. In many ways, it was a bridge between the life I had and the life I was craving. But deep down, I knew it still wasn’t the thing my heart wanted most. The work was meaningful, yet something about it felt misaligned, like I was forcing myself into a version of success that didn’t quite fit.

Slowly, quietly, another truth began to surface: what I really longed for was creativity and self expression. To return to my roots as an artist.

At first, I resisted. I told myself it wasn’t practical, that it was too risky, that maybe I’d lost whatever spark I once had. But the call got louder. And after years of deep loss and burnout, the very thing I had abandoned came back to save me.

Following a trip to Bali, I finally began to allow myself to listen. I picked up a pen and began drawing mandalas. What started as a simple experiment in curiosity became something much bigger—a meditative practice, a way of calming my overly active mind, and a path back to joy. In those quiet, repeating patterns, I felt myself begin to breathe again.

That experience confirmed what I already knew deep down: I didn’t want to live a life that looked good on paper but felt empty inside. I wanted authenticity, not performance. Freedom, not just security. Creativity, not endless productivity.

This blog is where I’ll share that journey—the lessons, missteps, and discoveries of choosing a different path. You’ll find stories about:

• Art and mindfulness—how creativity can be a form of meditation, a way into flow, and a mirror for self-growth.

• Travel and exploration—slow, intentional journeys that invite connection with new places, people, and perspectives.

• Living authentically—navigating transitions, letting go of old roles, and finding the courage to live unconventionally.

  
  

I don’t have all the answers, and I don’t believe there’s one “right” way to live. But I do believe there’s value in sharing the process—in opening the door to the messy, beautiful, ongoing work of creating a life that feels true.

If any of this resonates with you—if you’ve ever felt like the black sheep, questioned the script you were handed, or longed to return to a creative spark—you’re in the right place.